The decision to get a divorce is often an extremely complicated one, combining a great deal of emotional and financial stress. Some people choose to consult with an attorney early in the decision-making process in order to better understand their options and legal rights under the law. Others may talk to friends who have gone through a divorce or do research on their own. There is no singular path to reaching the decision to get divorced. Likewise, there is no singular path to getting divorced when working with the right attorney. No matter which path you choose, it is important to protect yourself while you are making these life-altering decisions. 

The list below details precautionary actions that you may want to take when you are considering a divorce: 

1.      Credit Cards. 

• Cancel all joint credit cards immediately.   
• If you do not already have a credit card, consider applying for one now.



2.      Bank Accounts. 

• Contact your financial institution where any joint accounts are held and ask about their procedures to eliminate the possibility of either spouse removing funds without a specific court order while the divorce case is pending. 
• If you do not already have a bank account in your name only, consider opening one.

3.      Loans & Debts.  If you have loans in joint names or loans that you have guaranteed, contact your lender about the following:

• Assurance that you will be notified of all late payments.
• Learn the procedure (if any) for removing yourself from liability. For example, your spouse obtained a new loan written in his or her name alone.
• Consider requesting a credit report and be sure to provide a copy to your attorney.

4.      Keep a Record. Make notes of conversations with your spouse that may be relevant to the divorce case, specifically everything related to custody. Make a record of the custody arrangement you and your spouse are following, noting when your spouse is contacting and spending time with the children. 

5.      Get Help.  

• You may want to talk to your financial planner or tax expert to assist you in making decisions prior to and during your divorce case. If you do not have either, you may wish to find one now or ask your attorney if they have any referrals.
• If you are in counseling or psychotherapy for yourself, it is most likely important to continue. If you are not in counseling, you may want to consider it now. Therapists can assist with the emotional roller coaster many people experience in your situation. Regular sessions can ease the stress and may indeed help you limit legal fees incurred during the divorce process. 

6.      Negotiations with Your Spouse.  Please discuss your plan for negotiating with your spouse with your attorney in advance. Always keep in mind the following:

• “Settlement” agreements between the two of you are nonbinding—and, therefore, can be an exercise in futility.  Additionally, you may accidentally make an agreement before knowing your legal rights.
• Settlement in divorce is a “package.” It is better not to agree to one thing out of the context of complete settlement. There are many ways to “divide the pie.” 
• If possible, reach agreements on the payment of bills and use of credit cards while the case is pending. If you are still residing in the same house, discuss the logistics of continuing to reside together or a plan for one spouse moving.

7.      Safety.

• Consider establishing a PO box or switching your mailing address to that of a close friend or relative, especially if you are still residing with your spouse.
• Find a place to keep documents safe and away from your spouse.
• Make sure to change any settings on your phone, computer, tablet, or websites that are programmed to share information with your spouse, such as shared calendars or apps that track and share your location.
• Be mindful of any devices that have shared text messaging capabilities. For example, are your text messages simultaneously updated on your iPad or laptop?
• Be cautious about the possibility that your spouse may have installed spyware on electronic devices or a GPS tracking device on your vehicle. Even without intentional effort on the part of your spouse, shared cell phone accounts may keep a record of your location that is accessible to your spouse. 

8.      Social Media.

• Be aware of any information that you put on the internet that may be accessible and viewable to others.
• Consider taking a hiatus from any form of social media while your case is pending, particularly the sharing of personal information regarding your situation or spouse. Posts on Facebook and Instagram can be used as evidence in your case. Even if you have your profile set to private, mutual friends or relatives that are still in touch with your spouse, may share the information that you post with your spouse.
• If you have previously posted on social media and are concerned about the content, you should discuss your concerns and the best course of action on how to handle this situation with your attorney.

All of the attorneys at The Center for Family Law have experience representing individuals going through divorce or a legal separation, and would be happy to sit down with you to discuss your options and legal rights. Please contact us today to schedule a consultation.